Get a life

I know men always complain about women expecting them to be mind readers but recently I have come to realize we expect them to be mind readers too.

I know I’d told my honey plenty of times things I want from him as far as relationship goes. Like I need for him to call everyday, especially when he’s out-of-town. I need for him to want to come over instead of me telling him to, since we don’t currently live together full-time. I need him pay more attention to me when we are together since we don’t see each other all the time. These are things that I have expressed to him on more than one occasion and like most people, he does what I need him to for a time and then slowly reverts back to the way things were before.

instead of me constantly telling him that he needs to do/be better I start to shut down. I don’t want to feel like a broken record and I am not the nagging type. I want him to know what I want without me having to constantly say it.

Recently we had a conversation about our relationship. He told me he doesn’t know whats bothering me unless I speak up and since I’m so easy-going he doesn’t know I’m upset about something until I start doing that shutting down thing I mentioned. My response to that is, I’ve told you before, why do I have to tell you again!? It’s like he only has short-term memory sometimes.

I feel like I don’t ask a lot from anyone so the things I do ask for, I need them done.

When we are together it’s typically lovely. We hang out. We laugh, we joke, we have sexy time and all is right with the world. When we aren’t together he slacks off and I can’t stand that.

But I’ve come to realize something. I need a life! Like one that doesn’t center around Jas 24/7 and one that isn’t centered around Honey. I need a life! I think once I get one then I won’t get myself worked up over such small things in my relationship ( And im not saying that the things I get most pissed about are small because to me they aren’t) because I will be too busy with my own life to sweat them.

Do any of you ever feel like you want your spouse to read your mind and just know? Do you ever feel like you need a life of your own?

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12 thoughts on “Get a life

  1. I think having a life of your own will help. I don’t really sweat those tiny things because I understand people show their love in different ways. It’s finding his way and accepting that as a truce.

  2. I agree that you need something that is just for you. On the flip side, I feel like if you’ve already laid out what your needs are for a relationship then he should remember them. Yes, communication in a relationship is constant but if I have to remind you every 3 to 6 weeks to communicate with me then I’m most likely going to get annoyed. Somethings, we just have to make an effort to remember and follow through on.

  3. “My response to that is, I’ve told you before, why do I have to tell you again!? It’s like he only has short-term memory sometimes.”

    Haha. I probably hear this at least once every other day. I admit, sometimes I’m playing dumb and other times I might have genuinely forgotten something she’s said. But guess what? It’s nothing to be taken personal and since it wouldn’t be me to speak the truth – I will say that we as men LISTEN after the woman has done the exact same to us. Lol.

    Hope you enjoyed Valentine’s Day.

  4. It’s so important that we do things outside of our relationships and our families, to help us still feel like “ourselves!” And communication is a constant, changing thing in every relationship – so I totally understand where you’re coming from. It’s hard to always have to express our needs and wants, but it’s necessary!

  5. I had a life…..one time…I miss that life and I want to go back. My life is centered around kids not so much my hubs but the kids because I don’t get a break from them because I have no family and no help with them. The internet including twitter and my blogging is my life and that’s sad. If you have babysitters take one day a week to yourself just to go to a coffee place or go see a movie.

  6. I could have written this. I asked myself the other day why I seemed to be pissed at my hubby all the time lately then I realized it was just in the last 4 years that this constant anger developed. then I realized I used to be so busy with my own life, friends, work, volunteering that I had no time to notice the stuff he did/didn’t do that bugged the crap out of me.

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