The one where SD is ordered to pay

 

So Friday I go and check my mail to find that I have something from the department of child support services. I thought they were sending me another letter asking for more information like that had previous. I ignored that notice. I decided that I did not want to further participate in any shenanigans concerning sperm donor. I refuse to be a part of the “baby mama” club. That is not my motto, so to see that envelope I can say I was a little peeved. I had already written this dude off and have gone on with my life as if he never existed.

I open the package and start reading. The letter is an order for SD to pay child support. It’s a very small about of money but considering SD probably has SEVERAL CHILDREN¬† I was not very shocked by the amount.

Now either SD went and put himself on child support ( which I highly doubt) or he stopped running from all the open claims her already had. In any case, I guess Jas wins. I’m really hoping he doesn’t try to surface now. I haven’t seen this dude since March of 2009 and Jas was born in October of the same year, you do that math.

My baby will be 3yrs old next month and this dude has never laid eyes on her in person. I’m not in the business of introducing my child to strangers and the fact that he’s a stranger because he chose to be.

Jasmine has a wonderful daddy who has been there from the beginning and will always be there no matter our status ( his words not mine).¬† We both love him so much and are very blessed to have him. He says he’s the blessed one.

Back to the point, it’s a win for Jas because he should be helping financially although I don’t need or want his help. But it’s not about me, it’s about what’s right and what’s right is this child support order.

12 thoughts on “The one where SD is ordered to pay

  1. I was bitter once I was ordered to pay child support, cause I took good financial care of my daughter and couldn’t figure why her mom would take me to court. Soon, I accepted the fact that she went thru all of this to appease her new husband and assure him that she and I were no longer an item. Her only words in court were the fact she wanted a money order every single month. I’m sure I could have fought it, but I saw no point.

    I had intentions on simply being a money order once a month, but as my daughter grew older I knew it wasn’t about her mom…it was about my daughter and I.

    Jas’s dad might undergo the same revelation before it’s all said and done.

    • I seriously doubt it. He’s still running from it. Hes nothing like you. He has never seen her , talked to her or paid a dime. I still don’t expect him to but I guess we’ll see

  2. I would check to see what rights paying child support does give him. And does he owe back child support? I am pretty sure he won’t have rights until that is current.

    But in the end, I would take it 1 day at a time. Jas is lucky to have a loving father as well as a wonderful mother but she will probably wonder about her bio dad at some point. Maybe he will want to see her and be a great 2nd dad…maybe he just wants to take care of her but feels he has no rights to her…who knows. But information always relieves any stressors!

    Also, give me Jas and I will hide her!

    Wishing you all the best of luck. These situations suck.

    • Thank you for your comment honey. I am taking it one day at a time for sure. And if I need her hidden i know exactly where to send her lol

  3. I say yay to more money! Even though its not much every little bit helps. But yeah that does raise the question of him wanting to see her. But if you know him well enough to say he wont want to then I guess thats it. And you cold always tell him no. His money doesnt necessarily “buy” visitation.

  4. I did not know your history re: SD, but I knew about Jas having a loving Dad in her life, which is so important for a little girl.

    You have my undying respect for not wanting to be in the “baby mama” club, and handling the situation like an adult. I am sorry for all the heartache you’ve endured, but now you have a wonderful man and father by your side, and both you and Jas more than deserve him.

    I hope the child support situation works out w/o too much stress, but you are doing the right thing. Even if it’s a little money, it can go into a college fund for Jas and you can invest it and let it grow. If she gets a scholarship, it can pay for her apartment! ;)

    • Jas has a wonderful Father and it really is a blessing that he chose her because I’ve told him before that he has a choice and it doesn’t have to be “this”. He assures me that he doesn’t have a choice and THIS is where he wants to be. I can’t do the baby mama thing. I just can’t and I hope the support thing doesn’t bring drama with it is all I hope for. Those pennies he’s he order to provide can help with how expensive freaking preschool is! lol

    • exactly T! Thats my biggest concern and child support gives him rights in a sense. I doubt he’ll ever call me tho so I don’t think I have to worry about it

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