I’m still here

Hey guys! A lot has happened in the past few weeks. I’ve been so busy I almost forgot about my little blog.

first I had my eye surgery on the 9th. things went well and my vision went from blind to 20/60 in mt left eye. It’s slowly getting back to normal and I can’t wait for it to be back to where it should be mostly so I can finish my book!

I have to go for laser surgery on my right eye next month. That should fix my vision in that eye and have me back on track.

I’ve met some new guys  and removed some from the roster. This dating thing is cool but I wish it wasn’t so much work. I really don’t have time for that part of it.

We went on a family reunion to Chicago and had a blast. I told one of my cousins we need to be more like other peoples families who really don’t like each other that much. 5 days together just wasn’t enough for us and I miss my family so much. The next reunion we’re hosting here in cali and I am so looking forward to it.

Jas started at a new school. She loves it. And when I say new I mean it. Her teacher from her previous school started a second school and there are only 3 kids attending so far. It’s still summer time to that’s ok. Jas loves being there  tho. She feels like such a big girl.

ISo that’s what I’ve been up to. I miss reading your blogs and things. Soon I’ll be able to get back to that without giving myself a headache straining my eyes lol.

Eye suck

So last Tuesday I had that procedure done on my right eye. My vision was already loads better and I was happy about it.

Yesterday morning I woke up fine. Made Jas breakfast then went and got back in my bed to finish my sleep while she ate.

Jas woke me up when she was dine and as soon as I opened my eyes I knew something was wrong. I couldn’t see through my left eye. I freaked out a little but tried not to panic.

I had to go on about my day like everything was good but my baby had her first dance recital and I could hardly see her on stage. It was bad and I cried.

This morning I woke up and there was no change so I called the specialist and they had me come in this afternoon. My doctor informed me that I have a blood clot and a leak in my eye which is why I can’t see.

Next Wednesday I’m scheduled for eye surgery to fix it. I wish it was sooner but I’m glad its fixable.

Until then I won’t be driving, I just don’t feel safe. My best friend has offered to take me back and forth to work until I’m back to normal.

My eyes suck but I’m thankful this won’t be permanent.

Pray for me please. And don’t make me cry in the comments.

P s. Any misspelled words, blame on my janky eyes. These things are look looking through a kaleidoscope.

The “date”

And  I put “date” in quotations because it really wasn’t a date.

I met a guy and he asked me out. I accepted even tho I didn’t feel he was my “type”. I’m all for having a good time these days so I said, what the hell and just went with it. He asked me out Monday and I didn’t hear from him until Wednesday evening when I text him,

“You ask a sista out on a date then don’t talk to her anymore? What’s up with that?”

He replied, ” Oh no it’s not like that. I was gonna call you this evening.”

Sure, I thought. I wasn’t gonna hear from this guys unless I reached out to him. That was a red flag for me.

He ended up calling me that evening and we had a conversation. I explained to him that I had just gotten out of a relationship and wasn’t in the market for anything serious. I was just trying to hang out and have a good time. He seemed to be cool with that.

During the course of our conversation, he said something that was another red flag for me.

“I’m the type of guy who isn’t in a rush. I feel like if I don’t do it today, I’ll get to it tomorrow.”

I scratched my head at this one. Who puts things off until tomorrow? Tomorrow isn’t promised. People need to live in the here and now and stop waiting for tomorrow.

To say I was a little turned off was an understatement, especially since this was the reason he was giving me for not contacting me first.

So Friday rolls around and he texts me that morning greeting me and saying he’ll see me that evening. I said okay and went on about my day.

He wanted to meet me at 7pm so I got my niece to watch Jas and I text him around 6:15 asking what the plan was. By 630 he texts me back with, “I’m sorry sweetie but I’m gonna have to take a rain check.”

I rolled my eyes so damn hard and didn’t bother responding to the message and I haven’t heard from him since.

I wasn’t going to waste a  baby sitter and an evening out so I called up a guy friend who I had been talking to for a little over a week and asked him if he wanted to hang out. Now mind you, I’m not interested in this man romantically and I’ve made that clear to him more than once. I don’t want him feeling like it could be something when I don’t feel it. I do however feel like he could be a great friend. We met at a local Starbucks and sat there talking and laughing for 3 hours. It was really a good time, but it wasn’t a date.

So I have yet to go on a date but I have continued to meet some very interesting people. Let the adventures in dating begin!

Medical minute

Well I went to the eye specialist yesterday. After I had dye shot through my veins that made me feel horribly nauseous, pictures were taken of my eyes.

The results were that I have edema or swelling at the back of both eyes. The right worse than the left. This is what’s causing my vision issues.

The good news is that it can be fixed. I go back on Tuesday to get a shot in my right eye first, then they’ll have me back to do the left. After that I get laser treatments on both eyes and then all should be well.

So I thank you all for your prayers and good vibes. They are as always greatly appreciated.

The truth is. . .

It’s been very easy for me to move on from my last relationship. I feel free emotionally and I really can’t describe that feeling. I’ve had so many men approach me in the past few weeks, I feel like I’m wearing a sign that says ” Hey I’m single, come holla at me!”. It’s a bit much at times while other times it’s just flattering. I love being noticed, especially when I’m not trying to be. I told my ex on more than one occasion that I was a catch and he wasn’t the only man attracted to me, I guess he gets to see that for himself now. The truth is, I stopped feeling “In Love” awhile back and was just going through the motions. I know for a fact there will always be a soft spot in my heart for him but I can no longer allow him to occupy the majority of it when he doesn’t know how to handle it properly.

I have an eye appointment tomorrow morning. The truth is, I’m scared. I really want my vision back to where it was. Seeing through my eyes currently is very depressing. I just really hope they can be corrected somehow. My vision is keeping me from finishing my book and I really want to write. I just can’t stare at the screen longer than a few minutes at a time because my heart starts to hurt. My eyes are working overtime currently so I try and give them as much of a break as possible. My writing is at a standstill because of it.

I know I said I would wait a few weeks before I started dating and that still stands but I got asked on a date and I said sure. The truth is, I can count on one hand how many dates my ex took me on the while time we were together. I’m looking to make up for lost time by going out and being entertained by men who appreciate my company. I’m young and attractive. I should start acting like it.

Jas wants to grow up. Yesterday she told me it’s taking a long time for her to turn 5. The truth is 5 will be here before she knows and it I’m not ready for her to grow up yet. I love my little cuddle bug. I hope she stays sweet and snugly for at least a few more years.


Well those are my truths. What have you guys been u to?


P.S any typos, blame this janky ass eyes of mine.